Real talk: stay PRESENT.

“I have NO idea how I am going to make it to Friday!”

That’s what I told my wombie, last night. ALL I saw was THREE MORE DAYS of existing, when I had barely scraped through Tuesday. Friday seemed so faaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr awwwwaaaayyyy!!!

Just thinking about it had me despairing….hmm……

AHA!!!!

Instead of staying, PRESENT, I was tornmenting myself imaging how hard the next day, then the next day, then the next day would probably be.

Fretted and prayed. Prayed and fretted. Realized, dummy, since you prayin’ what the world you frettin for???

Got some act right, right quick.

Prayed and asked God and Life for grace for tomorrow. Fought the night, to win the dawn. Lost, yet again…..*sigh*.

Yet, woke, still tired, but grateful/hopeful/joyful. God and Life had filled my morning with peace, THEIR Peace. No, I did not yet have peace of mind with missing mom and dad so. Yet, I had PEACE, in my heart, deep within my soul.

Peace my parents rested, in PEACE. Knowing this, well, it gave me peace. On top of this, God gave me His Love, His Peace, His Care. I felt LOVED, jamming to CeCe Winans, drinking coffee, thinking on good times I had with my parents, having a FANTASTIC cinnamon roll, getting geared up to attack and win my day.

I had completely forgotten about how I was supposed to be all tore up and despairing all day and the next day and the next day.

NOT!

God and Life makes EVERY day, FOR us. To ENJOY. To LIVE. To LOVE. To GIVE. To RECEIVE.

Yes, the day may also contain some tough moments, some rough moments and on and on. Yet, those are just moments, beloveds. We do NOT have to ruin an entire day because some moments were rough. We have the rest of the day to make the best of the day!

YYYAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

Grief did NOT have the last word.

Loss did NOT have the last say.

God and Life did!

YAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

I am so very thankful I made the CHOICE to stay PRESENT. I did not waste the day reminding myself how tough yesterday was. Yesterday is gone. Today, is what I have. It’s ALL I have. I am doing my utmost to use it wisely.

I’m glad I did not hide, under the covers, away from my wombie, away from myself, away from God, away from Life. Have done that way too many times, in the past.

Life is short, beloveds. Stay PRESENT.

Worry not, about what tomorrow may bring.

WHATEVER tomorrow brings, it brings God and Life with it! How awesome is that???! How bad a day could it EVER be KNOWING you are not alone in it, with it?

Life is Good. Even when it is hard. ESPECIALLY when it is hard. The hard gives us new opportunities to stand, live fully, love relentlessly, give endlessly, rejoice constantly, work consistently.

HOW GREAT IS THAT!!!!!!???

Don’t fear tomorrow, beloved. Look forward to it. Keep moving forward. It WILL be worth it, in the end.

Keep on stretching, beloveds. Keep on enlarging your tent, keep on opening your heart, keep on making your circle larger and larger and larger to contain all the love, dreams, hopes that God and Life have prepared for you.

We almost there, beloveds. We almost there….

Keep going.

I go with you.

I love you.

Me. πŸ™‚

Cassandra WHOLE

Put your hands together for YOU!

Put your hands together! For YOU!

YOU keep stepping up!

YOU keep showing out!

No matter what.

No matter how.

No matter where.

YOU

ARE

STILL

HERE!!

Put your hands together, for YOU.

YOU are fighting, still.

YOU are TRYing, still.

YOU are living, still.

YOU are striving, still.

Put your hands together, for YOU.

No,you are not where you had hoped to be. Yet, each day you are being the YOU God and Life created YOU to be.

YOU have been doing you!

Keep that head up!

Yes, the way has been hard. Yet, the hard thing is now just a light thing, for YOU.

In being YOU, in doing YOU, you have learned the secret to life. YOU have learned how to stand, fight, grow, live and love.

YOU have been learning to love you some YOU! ALL of YOU!

Put your hands together, for YOU.

Don’t allow the hardness, of the day, to remove your TRY or dampen your joy.

Grief/loss/tough times shall NOT and never shall EVER have the last say.

I put my hands together, for YOU.

I salute YOU.

YOU somethin’ else!

Keep going.

YOU got this.

Hard ain’t nothin’ but a verb to YOU.

Impossible has never even heard of YOU.

Victory lives with YOU and resides in YOU.

Mediocrity blows to YOUR greatness.

Put your hands together, for YOU.

I see YOU!

πŸ‘€

Cassandra BLESSED

#YourLifeMattersToMe

You are…

…loved.

Seen.

Heard.

Valued.

Take time to cherish YOU, today.

Life is short. Yea, it hurts, at time. Much too short, though, to waste too much of it on regrets, whatifs and omygoodnesses.

If you have been going through a rough patch, take a deep breath, tilt your head back and say…..ha! I got this!!

If I could take away life’s hurts, pains and strains for us all, I would. Since I can’t, I give us all to He who can and will as we reach out.

Take care as you are precious, priceless and without measure. There is none like you and never shall be.

LOVE you and let others in. Life much too short for hiding and surviving.

praying for us all,

Cassandra CHERISHED

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Broken pieces: You are NOT your pain.

Broken pieces: You are NOT your pain.


I have been trying to write this piece, since April. Today seems fitting, somehow.

Had to scrape my way, out of bed. Forced myself, to STAY at work. Dammit!

Sunday is Father’s Day. I BARELY made it, through Mother’s Day, in one piece.

Still, I stood.

This last week, though, has been impossible. Almost.

I was really doing okay, yall. That is, until I wasn’t. Grief has such an unfair way of sneaking up on you, unsuspecting. Here I was, minding my own, felt a tap on the shoulder and……

WHACK!!

I told myself that grief WILL NOT, absolutely will not, have the last say. I let grief know, loss will NOT have the last word.

Grief, got mad and whacked me, upside the heart, once again.

The one thing grief will never understand is God and Life will NEVER leave us to suffer grief, alone. So long as we reach out, God and Life will ensure we are okay. Will offer us comfort. Will be there, WITH us, as grief has it’s say.

Yet, it is imperative, during these times, we lean, HEAVILY upon God’s Deep and Abiding Love for us, on HIS Character, and HIS Word.

If not, we can, and often do, listen to grief’s sad song, for much longer than we should. Yes, grieving is necessary. It’s normal. It’s healing. We can allow grief and loss, though, to turn into something else, if we are not careful.

If we try and deny it, hide it, dismiss it, wish it away, it just comes out in other ways, often unhealthy ones, to boot.

Losing someone you love, losing something you have loved, letting go of something that has meant the world to you, is never easy. It was not meant to be so. We hurt so, BECAUSE we loved so hard and so much. No shame in that.

The most important thing to remember, when going through an especially tough time, is to KNOW that you are NOT your pain. Neither, am I. It just FEELS like it, doesn’t it? It’s tough, to think straight, when something has hurt you bad enough where you would dearly love to snatch your heart, out of your chest, and sit it somewhere, til the pain goes away.

We just want the pain to STOP ALREADY! Go kick some rocks, pain/grief/loss!!

It’s super important, to let God and Life in, to let folks who care for you, in, to support you, as you work your way up, out and through the painful moments. Far too many of us, my dumbsky self included, at times, tend to dismiss our grief/loss/pain as either ‘too heavy’ or ‘too inconvenient’ for others. We don’t want to ‘be a burden’…..smh….sigh.

Beloveds, you are never, ever, ever, ever, EVER a burden. Not to God. Not to Life. Not to those who truly love you. ALL want to support you, to watch your back, if you will but allow them to.

Be good to yourself. Be PATIENT with yourself. Be aware you are in a tough spot, having some tough moments.

Give yourself room to grieve, space to feel or not feel. Remind yourself it truly is okay to not be okay until you are okay again. You will be. I shall be.

In the meantime, keep on taking out the trash, living in the moment, loving folks and allowing folks to love you. Get enough to eat. Rest, as best as you can. Read a book. Listen to some uplifting music. The trick is to DO something.

Quitting is NOT an option.

Hiding is NOT an option.

Going into survival mode is NOT an option.

Keep on living, beloveds. Keep going.

You SHALL over come these moments.

As shall I.

You are NOT your pain.

Neither am I.

#YourLifeMattersToMe

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

Cassandra STANDING STILL

I am…

…enough.

You are…

…enough.

We are all…

…enough.

I am…

…loved.

You are…

…loved.

We are all…

…loved.

God loves…

…me.

God loves…

…you.

God loves…

…us all.

‘Nuff said. 😎❀

Cassandra LOVED

When loss is not a loss.

I miss my mom. I miss my dad. I miss my brother. Could go on, but will stop with them.

Have been fighting the good fight, being a good daughter, good sister, hard worker, supportive friend.

Exhausting. I want to not have to be those people, to have to do those things.

Took out the trash, yesterday. Didn’t want to. HAD to.

Made sure to eat. Made sure not to hide. Didn’t want to. HAD to.

Father’s Day is Sunday…*sigh *. Hey, dad. Still trying, to be a big girl. To be strong. To be good.

Want to tell effort, to tell my TRY, to go kick rocks.

Can’t do that. HAVE to keep going. Your loss wasn’t a loss. Your days came to their end, as must all things.

The trick is not allowing your natural end, to make me want to end my forward momentum. I would dearly love to.

Have considered hiding, in plain sight, until Father’s Day is over. Can’t do that, dad. HAVE to keep going. Have a life to live. Have trash to take out. Have a dishwasher to load and unload.

Think I will have a cup of coffee, mom, dad, and big bro. Will have a cup and think of you.

You are in your new journey. I must continue in mine. Wish I knew how to do this without you. God and Life says it’s okay to not be okay. No idea if I am okay or not.

You are not lost. Neither am I. Just FEEL lost without you.

Until I see you all again…πŸ˜₯

Cassandra HERE STILL

In this day.

Good Morning. Yes, it IS good. You are here. STILL.

You fought the night, to get to today, and won.

The day, is yours, to use as you please. You only get one. Use it wisely.

Laugh, in this day.

Love, in this day.

Spend some time with God, in this day.

Chop it up with Life, in this day.

ALLOW yourself to be loved, in this day.

Daydream, in this day.

Live, fully live, in this day.

Reach out, in this day.

Launch out, in this day.

This day, is yours, to use as you please. You only get one. Use it thoughtfully.

Encourage someone, in this day.

Be encouraged, in this day.

Listen to your heart, in this day.

Listen to the heart of another, in this day.

Take a chance, in this day.

Bet on YOU, in this day.

Believe, in YOU, in this day.

Rejoice, in this day.

Pray, in this day.

Dance, in this day.

Seek, in this day.

In this day, if you KNOW only one thing, hear only one thing, hear this…

God SEES you. God LOVES you. God CARES DEEPLY for your life.

As do I.

Your life matters.

Your life matters to me.

Be encouraged, in this day.

I pray for you, in this day.

I love you.

Me πŸ™‚

Cassandra LOVED

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Believe!

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYwSKZ8D1oM&feature=share

Believe.

Believe!

BELIEVE!!

Believe, in yourself.

Believe, in your future.

Believe, love IS for you.

Believe, your dreams ARE attainable and worth having.

Believe, you will make it.

Believe, you CAN.

Believe, you WILL!!

Believe, ALL things really do work together FOR YOUR GOOD.

Believe, you are MORE than a conqueror, through HIM, who loves you.

Believe, you CAN, do ALL THINGS THROUGH Christ.

Believe, you win, regardless of how you feel.

Believe, in your present.

Believe, in your future.

Believe, your past strengthened, NOT weakened you.

Believe, you are covered, in love, by Love.

Believe, in your efforts. They SHALL bring forth their fruits, in their time.

Believe, God loves you.

Believe, God fights for you.

Believe, Life will give way to you.

Believe, your steps are protected.

Believe, beloveds.

God SEES you. God LOVES you. God CARES DEEPLY for your life.

As do I.

believing for and with you.

Cassandra LOVED AND BELIEVING.

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Real talk: HIS Handwriting Part II

I was writing, yes, using my own ugly handwriting, this morning. It is both easy, and hard, to do. Okay, not easy. Hard. Why? This is what I wrote:

I was thinking about blogging about my handwriting. The more I ‘write’, the more I look at my “ugly” handwriting, the more I am forced to see my perceptions, of my handwriting, came from ME comparing it, to other people’s handwriting.

Writing, I get to LOOK. At me. The TRUE me. The me God made! HE made my hands, and the works of them. HE made me loud. HE made me boisterous. HE gave me my ridiculous sense of humor. HE made me super serious. HE gave me this deep love, for people. People I will never see or meet. Yet, I love them. Still. I pray for them. I worry for them. I want them to KNOW they are not alone.

Writing, today, I don’t cringe, as much. My handwriting is HIS. As am I. He loves it. He loves ME. I am learning to love ALL of ME. I WILL love ALL of me! πŸ™‚

It’s never easy to admit we don’t always, or often at times, see ourselves the way we need to. The way God sees us. The way Life sees us.

At times, we look, at ourselves. We pick apart this and cringe at that. We wonder how, in the world, could God, could Life, could others, POSSIBLY put up with, let alone love, this part of me or that part.

Thinking these things, we hide those ‘unworthy’ parts. Not knowing, the parts we view the least, God loves the most. Life needs them most. Those who love and care for us need them. They need to see us. ALL of us.

In resplendent gold. In dowdy grey. ALL of us IS:

Important.

Priceless.

Needed.

Necessary.

Loved.

Seen.

Heard.

Yes, we have things which needs tightening up. Yes, we have things which need to grow. Yes, we have things which need to be put away, when their end has been met.

Yet, in ALL these things, they ALL work together, for our good.

Every moment, of our lives, have been a benefit, if we allow them to be. The moments we find cringe worthy. The actions that did not lead to the best choices or outcomes. The thoughts that led us to places familiar and unfamiliar.

ALL these things have led us to the person we are, today.

The person you are, today, may not be one you are proud of, because of past or present doings. Isn’t it wonderful, to know that God and Life have taken ALL into account? Any moment, we choose, we can have a ‘do over’

We can start, again. We can build, again. We can be renewed, again. We can be born again, again. We can hope, again. We can live, again. We can win, again.

I love me, today. As I am. Broken parts, healed parts, I don’t even know parts….smh. I love ALL of me, today. I promise to do my best to love me, tomorrow. Yet, I live, in this moment, today, and love me. Tomorrow will take care of itself.

On a side note, the more I love me, the more I feel the Love of God, of Life, FOR me. Awesome. Amazing!

It makes me sad, looking at my handwriting now, knowing how much I had always hated it, hated looking at it, thinking it was not pretty enough or stylish enough or smart looking enough.

*sigh*

Makes me sad, for ALL of us, how we limit ourselves, view ourselves, think less of ourselves, at times.

I am so thankful God and Life cared enough to set a bush ablaze. THAT burning bush. The one that caused me, to turn aside, to see and hear what God and Life had been waiting to tell me, to show me.

They just wanted to show me, well, ME. The true me. The one They created, before I was ever born. The me that was meant to be, that IS:

Blessed.

Loved.

Cherished.

Honored.

Received.

Valued.

Priceless.

Precious.

There is NOTHIHNG I need to add, to me, to make me valuable. Yes, there are things I can, I must, I WILL do, to maintain, to grow, the greatness ALREADY contained, within me. Yet, if I did nothing else, if I stopped my TRY, I am loved.

STILL.

ALWAYS.

RELENTLESSLY.

As are you.

Keep going, beloveds. Don’t be afraid to face your ‘handwriting’, whatever your ‘handwriting’ symbolizes.

Your life matters.

YOU matter.

Your life matters.

To, me.

To, God.

To, Life.

To, others, as you allow them in.

Draw closer, beloveds. Draw closer, to God, to Life, to folks. We need each other. I need you, in my life. You need me, in yours. Folks in our lives, well, they need to be able to love on us, to love us, to have us love them, fully. As God and Life intended.

This, person of color, me, love ALL of my brothers and sisters and others. Even the dummy ones who are too afraid to allow themselves to love folks who don’t look, talk, feel, see things, like them. Yes, love me some of them hard headed folks.

Love someone, beloveds. Begin, with YOU. Then, branch out and love some others who don’t think, see, feel, know, experience life as you do. We need each others love and perspective.

I love you.

Love me back.

Please and thanks.

His Daughter and your big/lil sis,

Cassandra FULFILLED

Hope ALWAYS wins!

How great is that!?

Don’t EVER allow yourself to turn loose of your hope.

Hang in there. Someone needed this message. Hang in there. You got this.

Cassandra HOPEFUL STILL

#YourLifeMattersToMe

😎