Standing has been hard, today.
Standing appeared to be impossible, today.
Standing hurt terribly, today.
Healthwise, workwise, likewise. Hard enough I actually considered quitting.
Nevertheless, I stood. On zero sleep. On zero personal understanding. On pressure from without and from within.
I thought of how I allowed myself to stand alone, the other day, when the pressure was the same.
I REFUSED to stand on my own, today. I turned on praise/worship music I wasn’t feeling. KNOWING that God inhabits the praises of His People.
I yelled aloud the scripture that God is a PRESENT help in the time of trouble. I hollered for help, literally. Told God I needed help, that I wanted to quit. Told Him I am NOT a quitter and will stay here, in this very spot, until He gives me GRACE.
I did not ask for a way of escape. This is HIS way for me, in this present moment. He knows why He needs me here. It’s not about my comfort, right now.
There are times, in our lives, when God and Life just needs us to stay there, in the hard place, at the hard time. They don’t have the time to tell us why. Someone is in need. The someone may not even be you.
Does it really matter?
It does not. So, I stood. THIS time, I stood on God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, and on God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
In doing those things, I saved myself from making a permanent choice to take me out of a temporary situation.
Either way, the loser would have been me. The loser may have also been others that God and Life had been tending to THROUGH my standing.
Our standing affects EVERYTHING and EVERYONE in our circle and beyond.
God told me once that our lives are like making a ripple. That ripple can turn into a pond. That pond can become an ocean. That ocean can become a tsunami. That tsunami can change the world.
WE can change the world. At the very least, we change our world and the worlds around us just by standing.
I have no idea if these words have helped a soul. I know they touched MY soul.
I changed my own life by checking myself, BEFORE I wrecked myself. I could have brought a negative tsunami, of my own making, by standing on fear, doubt, unbelief.
We can also wreck ourselves when wanting OUT. Just out of the hard situation. We do ourselves such a disservice, I think.
We fight, to the death, for folks we care for. Would never give up so easily when it comes to them. Yet, we can give ourselves permission to give up, give in and make excuses why we didn’t, couldn’t, or wouldn’t.
The more I stand, the more that I hang out with God and Life, the more They give of Themselves to me, the more I want to give to Them. I can’t give Them less than 100.
I can’t give myself less than 100.
I even refuse to lean my full weight upon my fam or folks who love me. I put my full weight on God’s Shoulders.
AFTER leaning on God, on God’s CHARACTER, and God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me, I allowed myself to reach out to ask for grace.
The bible says that Gods yoke is easy and His burden is light. Leaning upon HIM, the hard place was still hard but my heart was now light.
I could see, again. I could hear, again. I could breathe, again.
When all hell breaks loose, when situations come at you in waves, when pain, physical, mental, or otherwise, rocks your world it’s easy to look upon the waves and become fearful.
Remember, beloved to CHOOSE to stand. Then, stand.
The more life, situations, and folks cut up on you, the more practice you get standing, leaning, exercising your faith, allowing your fam/friends to step back from their need to want to rush in and save you from hurt and discomfort.
ALL things work together, for our good. No, God and Life does not enjoy seeing us in pain. Yet, the pain is normal when giving birth, when something is being healed, when things are lost and/or taken away.
It is only AFTER we have come out, on the other side, that we reap the rewards of standing: our faith is strengthened, our joy is restored, our hope is renewed.
This is exactly why Jesus went to sleep during the storm. He had full confidence in God’s Word to go to the other side, on God’s CHARACTER, that they would arrive safely, and on God’s Deep and Abiding Love, that He will ALWAYS be there to protect us.
Standing, is a choice. WHAT to stand on, is a choice. Even choosing not to choose, causes life/situations/others to choose what we stand on, what we stand FOR.
Standing was hard, today. Nevertheless, I stand.
Standing hurt, today. However, I embrace the Yikes and the Egads and have laughed my way through the hard.
Did the hard stop being hard? Of course, it didn’t.
I thank God and Life for all the hard moments, today. I am grateful for them. They have made me a better me. They have drawn me closer to living life, not simply surviving it.
What a beautiful place this hard place has turned out to be. Think I shall use God’s Pillow and stick around this hard a while.
Keep going. Keep standing. Lean heavily on His Power not your will power. Your willpower won’t when the rubber meets the road.
We got this. God and Life has us.
Remember God loves you no matter how many times you fall, no matter of you win the day or feel as though you have lost it.
Your victory was had the MOMENT you CHOSE to stand. Even if you fell, you won still. Arise. Begin, again. I begin with you.
God’s Fave Daughter,