And THEN, my heart opened.

Yesterday, I stood. Today, I stand. Yesterday, the standing, was hard. Nevertheless, I stood. However, I arose.

In standing, even when it was hard. Yea, varily through standing through the hard and with the hard, THEN, my heart opened.

Today, I sit, staring at this blank page. Nevertheless, I am now free to speak, to breathe, to have movement. So much so, I race to capture and put down the words racing to be free of this worn, tattered and grateful heart of mine.

I met Jesus, you see, while standing through the hard. I met ME, you see, standing through the hard. I met, My Father, standing through the hard. I experienced Life, for the very first time through standing through the hard.

Yesterday, I had been surviving Life. Nevertheless, I stood. On God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, on God’s Deep and Abiding Love, for Me. Today, I LIVE, not survive.

In standing, I found that God’s Word were no longer just words. They became the air that I breathe, they became all that I need. I found that God’s CHARACTER was no longer an abstract thing, an unseen thing.

In standing, I found that God’s CHARACTER was steady, it was strong, it was full of integrity. It could be trusted. God was no longer a stranger. He was now a father. MY Father.

In standing, I found that God’s Deep and Abiding Love, for me, truly was for ME. His Love made me whole.

In standing, in allowing God’s Word, God’s CHARACTER, and His Deep and Abiding Love for me to hold me up, as I stood, I found that, indeed, God, now My Father, My Strong Tower, and My Deep and Abiding Love had become My Home.

And, in becoming My Home, I find that I AM home. Finally, at last. I am home. For, I AM abides with me. He abides IN me. In so doing, I am home. He is my home.

I have been looking, for home, all of my life. Looking to find where I fit in, where I am known, where I will be loved.

Yesterday, I sought. Today, I sit, grateful, knowing my seeking days are over. Never to return. I found home. I have home. I AM home.

Today, I stand. Today, I arise. Not in victory. I arise, in gratitude, thankful to a Father who allowed me the space, the grace and the time to grow and KNOW, of a surety, that I have come home. I have come home, to Father, MY Father.

Today, I cry. Tears, of joy, of awesome wonder. I no longer await a knock, at the door. I no longer await, the ring of the phone. I no longer await an email, a letter, a kind word, a soft touch, a thought look. All of these things, and more, my heart experiences continually now from a father, from My Father, through His Word, through His CHARACTER, and through His Deep and Abiding Love, for me.

I am free now. Ever shall I be free. Forever. FOREVER!

Today, I stand. Nevertheless, the me that races to fill the blank page, is not the same she that sat here only just yesterday. However, she is exactly the same. She is just new, she is just free. She is just ME. She is beautiful. She is confident. She is joyful. She is hopeful. She is love. She is loved.

What will she be tomorrow? To her, it no longer matters. She is home.

Today, I stand. Not knowing what the next second may bring. Nevertheless, I am content. No matter where I go, I am home. No matter what comes my way, I am known. No matter what happens, I am never alone. However, I shall continue to stand, on God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, upon His Deep and Abiding Love, for me.

2 Corinthians – 1:20 “For all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen, unto the glory of God by us.”

Matthew 7:7– Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

Jeremiah 29:13 -And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

Romans 8:38-3938For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our LORD.

Today, I stand. Seeing, through new eyes. Experiencing home. Today, I live. Yesterday, I cried. Nevertheless, those tears of sadness, of loss, led to me standing, led me home, to a father, to My Father. I am home. However, I shall continue, to stand.

Today, I stand, in unity, in prayer, with and FOR you. I stand, for those too weary, too disbelieving, too heart sick, to stand alone or at all. Nevertheless, I KNOW they will be okay, I KNOW that YOU will be okay. If you are reading these words, I am standing with/for you. Today, tomorrow, so long as I have breath, I shall stand, pray and wait for others to find their home, to find a father, THEIR Father.

Dad waits for you. I wait with Him. Come, my sister, my brother. It’s time for you to find and experience home, time for you to start living and not simply existing, counting down the clock until your days end.

Today, I stand. Not knowing if any shall stand, with me. Nevertheless, I stand. However, I shall continue to call out, to entreat, to encourage others to stand.

I love you. I stand. I am here.

Cassandra

His and yours…

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