Time to make the chili!

I love chili. Love me some chili!!! Bean-less, of course. I know. I know. We could get into an endless debate about chili with or without beans. Another story for another day. Will say, though, that folks who eat chili with beans….smh….*Cassandra doesn’t know what to think about folks who would mess up a perfectly good bowl of chili putting beans in it!*….*shiver*….

Anywho, I have been wanting to make chili. For aeons. At least for the last two years. Yes, like a big moron, I have been too afraid to try to make some blasted chili. I was afraid I wouldn’t season enough. Or, worse, I would over season it. Yech. Eww. Nothing worse than salty chili or stale crackers.

So, I warily looked at different recipes, online. I asked advice of this person and that one. How do YOU make yours? What do you put in it? How much? How long do you let it cook? Simmer? Which seasonings?

Dear God there are so many choices when making chili. Even bean-less chili. Intimidated by the unlimited choices I did nothing……*sigh*……*Cassandra remembers the nightmare of doing nothing about taking out the garbage*….*shiver*

Think of Percival, the fly, I decided to take the chance and try my hand at some chili. Percival thought this a great idea. Yes, he is STILL around, bugging me. Darn it all.

I called my guy cook friend. Man, he can cook yall. He is my teacher. Tells me how much and how long and Cassandra just cook the damn chili would you? Okay, okay, I told him. I made the blasted chili.

Must admit, it was kinda fun. Tinkering around. Measuring the different spices. Being WILLING to try new and different spices. Before I would stick with only the basics: Lawrys and pepper. That’s it! Wasn’t willing to branch out. One day, though, I got tired of the same old, same old spices. I was ready to try something new.

That had me thinking about life and how I had learned to try and do new/different things since mom passed away. Funny how losing something major can teach you how to enjoy the minor things in life, huh? I learned it was okay to try and fail and laugh and get up and fail again and to try again and fail and laugh….rinse and repeat. 🙂

I learned that it is perfectly okay not to be okay at times. It’s okay not to get things right the first time or second time or even the tenth time or maybe not at all.

How did the chili come out? Pretty well, I think. I adapted it and added a bit of BBQ sauce. My cooking guru told me his auntie had put BBQ sauce in hers and it came out well. I enjoyed it in mine. Yet, something was missing. A bit of something I could not put my finger on no matter what I tried. I finished it off and promised myself I would try again.

This past weekend, I tried my hand at another small pot of chili. This time I was more confident. I was more prepared. I had purchased different spices, felt confident enough to add a bit more of that, a bit less of that. Wonderful! It tasted wonderful.

Do you want to know something really weird? In taking the chance, in FINALLY summing up the courage to go ahead and make that chili whether it was a disaster or master piece, gave me the courage to try some other things. Gave me the gumption to work on my life dream of being able to write and work from home, for myself. I began to do those things that will bring me closer to achieving that goal. Yet, in beginning, haven’t I already found success? I am writing. Sharing with you. Not knowing the outcome. Open to new adventures, to meeting new friends to seeing if this writing dream will be a dream or turn into a disaster.

I have no idea. Only know I enjoyed that chili. Only know I am enjoying writing, now, and entertaining myself and hopeless one or two or ten or a thousand or….

What if no one is entertained, you may ask? What if your dream(s) never come to pass? To that I say, so what. I tried. I have grown. In the chili making. In the Me making. In the writing. EVERY day that I try I grow. Every day that I reach out is one more day someone is getting encouraged, hopefully.

I want to say back to you: what is it, in your own life that you have been afraid of trying, for fear of failure? What do you honestly want to do but are afraid folk may laugh at you, life may tell you to get to stepping, or your friends may say what kind of dumbness is that?

I encourage you to go ahead and make the blasted chili, as my friend encouraged/admonished me. The world needs your ‘chili’. The world needs what you have to share. YOU need to know that you can do this thing called life. You CAN. You WILL. As you try. And fail and try. And fail. And laugh. And Fail. Rinse and Repeat.

Life is short. Folk are hungry. Let me know how your chili came out, wouldja? Don’t allow another day to go by controlled by fear: fear of what may happen or what may not happen. Life is short. LIVE! Aren’tcha tired of simply existing?

Cassandra

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